Honestly, I wasn’t one that was called as an active church member and I even skipped Sunday service sometimes. I am a mere human, afterall. However, when I heard from B and his cousins that a well known pastor from Indonesia – Ps. Philip Mantofa is coming to Kota Kinabalu for 2 nights event, my heart yearns to be there. Years ago, and occasionally until now, I will scrolled down YouTube and listened to sharing/sermons by all these wise man, whom fortunate enough with being blessed with God’s special gifts, giving their endless sharing through many topics. My favorite would be about why God let us went through a horrible break up and so much more.
The first night event was called “Neraka itu Nyata” or in English “Hell is real”. Ps. Philip shared his journey 17 years ago when God brought him to visit hell. I couldn’t imagine all the things that he saw but one thing I know is that the visit had affected him more than anything which prompted him to share with everyone. I believe that hell is real as I believe heaven is real too.
The second or the last night event was called “Malam Roh Kudus” (i.e the night of the Holy Spirit) and this particular event called to me more than anything I have ever “feel” before. I couldn’t stop thinking about it and all I’ve wanted to do was to go there as early as possible and get a better seat since we were so far away from the main stage during the previous night. For the last event, we came as early as 2.30PM and started to line up outside the stadium to get better place. Fortunately this time we managed to get seating near the stage area.
I believe that God purposely gave me an “instincts” that makes my soul yearns to worship and pray to Him. Honestly, my life has been one heck of a mess in these past year. The last time I went to this church event was 2 years ago, when I was mending my broken heart. I was so caught up with everything around me and there was time that I was lost and I purposely makes myself that way. When your heart know it was totally wrong and yet you did it anyways. There’s this calling that have been clouding my heart for quiet some time. During PJB, I couldn’t stop myself from feeling like a worthless human being but yet I could feel all the blessing and God’s love for me. That makes me cry so hard. This event changed my life – for good. All glory and gratefulness to God blessing upon me and people that He send for me.